I have friends who always go out of their way to help people, to support people, to encourage people. Sometimes they get some of that reciprocated, other times they don't, but they still do it because it is who they are. It is a part of them that they do not want to change.
Then there are my two boys. They are generous, kind, compassionate young men. (Currently, they are ten years old and thirteen years old.) The love people (they take after me ;)), and would go out of their way to do anything for anyone. But, there is just one piece of advice, one thing that I would want them to remember... and you too! Invest yourself wisely! What do I mean? Think of yourself as a bank account... In the beginning of your life, you are full; rich. As you go through life, you withdraw from your account (yourself) and invest in relationships. Sometimes you get a return, when you invest in the right ones. Other times you never receive anything in return. As you go through life, invest your time and energy in the right relationships. They will not leave you empty or drained, but will replenish you, and encourage you. Don't end your journey broke.
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They say communication is the key to a successful relationship. Whether it be a couple, friends, business... communication is what makes it thrive.
I would have to say that trust is another one, if not the biggest one to have. You can be in business with someone you do not love. You can trust someone based on their actions without communicating with them... but you do not usually love someone wholeheartedly if you do not trust them... you do not usually want to communicate openly with someone you do not trust. Trust is a cornerstone. When people trust you, they are relying on you and your integrity, strength - they have confidence in you. They place their hope in you, "trusting" you will not hurt them or lead them wrong. It takes time to build that trust. It takes effort, and requires proof - a history of being able to be relied on.Teacher/student, spouses, friends, partnerships - they all require a foundation of trust so they can thrive and grow. But trust is a very fragile thing. It can be broken in the blink of an eye. In a relationship, if a woman/man slips once, it will take years, if not forever, to prove they are trustworthy again. Sometimes, trust can be shattered to a point it can never be present again, period. Yeah, you may still talk, you may still be "friends", but nothing will ever be the same again. Breaking trust hurts. When people tell you something and then you go behind their back and spread gossip - that hurts. When you promise one thing and then go back on your word - that will destroy trust. When you cheat on someone, or cheat them out of something? Yup... trust is gone. We are all guilty of either misplacing our trust, or of breaking our word to someone and putting a block on that trust - if not guilty of both. I just wanted to share this with you all to encourage you to: Trust wisely. Not everyone is worthy of it. Make them prove their integrity before placing your hope in them. Misplaced trust only leads to pain and heartache. Hold dear those who truly place their trust in you. They will be the ones to lift you up, but once you break that trust, you may fall...don't wait until it is too late to realize that the person whose trust you broke is the one person you need. THINK before you risk shattering that "bridge of trust" Don't do anything that would damage trust you have worked to build. Every action, every word, ends with a result. Make sure the actions you take, the words you speak, are going to get you to the end result you are hoping for. Trust wisely! We follow their advice and try to do exactly what they are doing. Follow their guide and you could see success like they have.
We stop being who we are, and we try to become more like "them". But, it doesn't always work. We don't have their life and we don't have their schedule. We don't have their finances, their time, etc. So, it may not work, and then we get disappointed and feel like giving up because we haven't reached THEIR goals for US! The truth is, we just can't be them. We will never be them, and no one will ever accept YOU for being THEM. There is already a spot in the world for "them" and they have filled it. It is not vacant, it is not empty and up for grabs... so you know what? Stop trying to be them Start being YOU! There is a spot in this world for YOU, and you are the only one who can fill it. No one else can be you the way you can. And remember: You are a "them" to someone else. There is someone out there trying to be just like you. So, stop trying to make them think that being YOU is bad... being YOU is the only thing you will ever do perfectly in your life. So, go out there into the world and be YOU! Accept yourself for being YOU and not being them. You are a perfect you. I was on my way to a party over the weekend and had my two sons in the car with me. I love listening to the radio whenever I am in the car, and often times you will find me singing along with the song. (Whether I know the words or sing in tune, lol).
Well, scanning through the stations, I came across a song. It is probably not new to many, but it is the first time I had heard this song. The lyrics of it are inspirational and motivational... The song? "DO SOMETHING!" by Matthew West There are so many terrible things going on in the world. Pain, suffering, wars, terrorism, political debates, racism, religious persecution, people tearing one another down. Each day I watch the news with a sickness in my stomach and a heaviness in my heart. Another stabbing; another bombing; another shooting; sex slaves being sold; men, women, children being tortured; innocents killed for political or religious reasons. Many of us sit around complaining. We sit in our comfortable homes, behind computer screens, and attack one another for differences of opinion on many subjects. We do our best to have the last word in arguments. We are proud of ourselves when we make our point, never mind the person at the other end of the argument who was hurt by words that may have been said. Never mind that they have a personal reason for feeling the way they do, and you know nothing about their reasons. No matter your religion, if you have one or not. No matter your political association. No matter your country. No matter your wealth, or absence of it. No matter what side of a debate you are on... at the end of the day we are all human beings. We all live on this planet. We all use its resources. We can sit back and ask, "If there was a God, why does He allow this?..." Or, we say, "There is no God. You are all doing this to yourselves..." We can ask all the questions, make all the statements we want, but at the end of the day this is our world. And we could all put our words, our actions to better use than these fights and arguments. We could do so many great things. We, as a human race, are so much greater than the negativity that has been reported daily on the news. There needs to come a time when we stop complaining; we stop making excuses and stop pointing the finger; a time when we decide we are going to DO SOMETHING. So, I share this with you, not for any religious purpose, no other agenda other than to help stress my point that there are many things in this world that are more important than pen names, number of friends, or political associations... I challenge each of you to get out there and do something! Each and every action, small or great, can make an impact on another person. Make your words, your actions count for something great. So a while back i wrote a book a really long book about 45000 words. long which is long for me since the majority of my, books are only arounf 20000 words
i was prowd of my Book that i worked so hard on i self published my book and was so excited when i got my first sale and then my next follow by the next then i got an email from a reader who loved my book and thought. it was hot and Steamy then not long after that i got a review that criticizd my grammer and editing i was. offended because i lloved my book so Much and worked hard on it and thought they did not. know what they were. talking, about that was too years ago and i have published severil boocks since then and have lerned so much i recently spent hours and hours editing the first book i ever. published so i could republish the book under my new pen name. man my editing and writing were BAD really bad. and one of the things i lerned was that editing is very importint to the success of a book. good editing Helps the reader read the book more fluidly it helps the reader know the feelings and emotions of the character it allows the reader to escape into a world completely Different to the one they are living in so One thing i would urge all Wryters to do is to make sure you edit or have your book edited i am far from perfect and still amke so many mystakes but i no longer get offended by comments on my grammer i use them to make my writing better. ***Gotcha! ;)*** |
Ashlee Shades
Ashlee loves sharing a piece of her mind - and her heart - in her blog posts. She hopes you enjoy the musing. Archives
February 2020
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